Movies And Metal

Like most people, I have opinions about what I have and haven’t enjoyed over the past year and so it is I present to you the 20 movies that have caused me to get more than a little excited. But before we start, I feel I must share with you the few rules that I imposed upon myself:

1. I have to have actually seen it. People may moan that I haven’t included ‘Survival of the Dead’, but at the time of writing I haven’t physically seen it. I know that doesn’t stop some people writing about them, but I feel it is important.

2. These are all movies that have that are new to home viewing in 2009. Some of them have been around for a while, having been shown at festivals last year and suchlike, but the dvd’s only got released this year, and therefore they are movies that are new viewing in 2009. Along the same theme, I didn’t include ‘Night of the Creeps’ as, even though it is new to dvd this year, it has been available on video since 1986, and is therefore not new home viewing. I feel I need to make these things clear, before the hate mail arrives.

3. Some purists may not like one or two of the inclusions, because they are not strictly ‘horror’. The word ‘horror’ is fairly broad, and I suppose I could have used ‘genre’ instead, but I think we all know what I’m getting at. The same way that AC/DC aren’t strictly heavy metal, but they’re still appreciated by that audience and still included in metal magazines.

4. ‘Rob Zombie’s Halloween 2’ is shit, so it isn’t included. Same goes for ‘Friday the 13th’.

All clear? Good. Right, on we go and I hope you enjoy it:

20. Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans – Entertaining in a way that the third part of a series normally isn’t, ‘…Rise of the Lycans’ took us back to the origins of the war between the vampires and the werewolves. With a cast headed up by Bill Nighy and Michael Sheen, both on cracking form, this proved that big-budget Hollywood horror movies don’t have to be total piles of generic toss and can actually be pretty good.

19. Antichrist – Lars Von Trier’s controversial study of depression and its effects, this was probably the most uncomfortable watch of the year. Willem Defoe and Charlotte Gainsbourg play a couple who lose their young son after he falls out of a window while his parents are having sex. In an attempt to beat his wife’s depression and fear of nature, therapist Defoe takes her to a cabin in the woods called Eden, and that’s where her psyche starts to unravel. Featuring disturbing scenes of male and female genital mutilation, and other such pleasantries, ‘Antichrist’ isn’t easy viewing, but credit to the two leads for giving such amazing performances, and to Von Trier for managing to get some cracking publicity courtesy of The Sun.

18. Embodiment Of Evil – The third part of a trilogy that began in 1964, ‘Embodiment of Evil’ sees the return of José Mojica Marins iconic character Coffin Joe. Now released from prison after forty years Coffin Joe is still seeking a woman to bear him a son and continue his bloodline. Full-on brutality mixed with some frankly bizarre surrealism (a captive woman being force-fed her own buttock, anyone?) and an engaging performance by Marins all combine to make one of those movies you wish more people would see, partly so you can see people’s reactions and partly so you didn’t have to justify how delightful a Brazilian movie about a lunatic gravedigger covering a woman in hot cheese and letting a rat run riot can be.

17. Let The Right One In – A big hit on the festival circuit last year, Tomas Alfredson’s movie of John Ajvide Lindqvist’s vampire novel eschews the familiar vampire trademarks and offers up a compelling tale about loneliness and eventual companionship. Set against a backdrop of Scaninavian coldness, the movie is almost fable-like in its narration, and proved that great storytelling and stylistic filmmaking can be more effective than blood-and-guts gore and action.

16. My Name Is Bruce – ‘Evil Dead’ star Bruce Campbell gets mistaken for his Ash character and gets asked by the inhabitants of a small town to fight a Chinese demon. Believing it to be a publicity stunt set up by his agent, Bruce heads off to the cemetery to do battle, and unaware that he really is going to do battle with a Chinese demon. B-movie silliness as only Campbell can do, this was a real treat for fans of cult cinema, and helped propel the Campbell legend into the mainstream.

15. The Children – A Christmas break turns into a nightmare when the children from two families start showing homicidal tendencies towards their parents. A dark little shocker, The Children has a few faults and never quite lives up to its promise, but there are some chilling moments to be had, and there’s nothing quite as scary as children turning on their parents, is there?

14. Cradle Will Fall – The most effective horror movies are those that emulate real life situations, and ‘Cradle Will Fall’ (or ‘Baby Blues’ in the US) is certainly one of the most effective and startling movies of recent times. After suffering a postnatal breakdown, a young mother on a secluded farm goes on the rampage and starts slaughtering her children, leaving the eldest to play a dangerous game of cat and mouse with his deranged mother. Surprisingly creepy and suspenseful, this solid shocker seemed to creep under the radar, but is definitely worth seeking out.

13. Manhunt – Another entry for Scandinavia, this charming little flick goes down the ‘rednecks hunting innocent people’ route. Except in Norway. A group of friends travel across the country and pick up a hitchhiker (I’ve heard this plot before somewhere…), and then descend into a hellish journey after getting ambushed by a group of hunters. Tense, gory and completely gratuitous, ‘Manhunt’ may not win any awards for originality, but the pace and sheer frenzy of its execution make it stick out above the rest.

12. The Hills Run Red – The title is a bit of a giveaway. A horror film fanatic goes looking for a film director who made a notorious slasher movie in the early eighties that was apparently so gruesome that nobody was ever allowed to see it. With help from the director’s daughter and some friends he finds the guy he’s looking for, and discovers that the movie isn’t finished yet. Low budget gorefest from Dave Parker, this is trying to be an intelligent, ironic slasher in the vein of ‘Scream’ – but it isn’t! Ignore the pretensions of greatness and it is a pretty ballsy little horror flick that covers all bases of sex, violence and tons of blood. Nice turn from William Sadler as the director, too.

11. My Bloody Valentine 3-D – The first remake in the list, ‘MBV’ utilised the resurrected 3-D format to pretty good effect in this solid slasher. A mining accident claims the lives of five people and the only survivor, comatose Harry Warden, is accused of their murders. After Harry wakes up on Valentine’s Day and kills again, he is pursued back to the mine and shot down by the local police. Ten years on, and the mine’s owner Tom Hanniger, who was the cause of the original accident, returns to the town but finds himself in trouble as the murders have started again. Has Harry returned from the dead? You’ll just have to watch, but this movie really isn’t as bad as it could have been, considering the quality of some of the bigger-name remakes. Nice cameo by genre veteran Tom Atkins as the Sheriff and some cool death scenes make this a fun movie that won’t blow your mind, but it does entertain.

10. Eden Lake – Shown at last year’s Frightfest but released on dvd this year, ‘Eden Lake’ is a Daily Mail reader’s dream. Middle class couple Jenny and Steve spend a cosy camping weekend by a lake, only to have their time ruined by the young thugs that turn up creating a nuisance. After mildly threatening harassment turns to outright savagery, the couple must use their wits to try and escape the gang, who seem hell-bent on killing the innocent pair. Frighteningly realistic, this movie is pretty shocking in its attempts to show how threatening kids in numbers can be. Containing a very nihilistic outlook and a maybe slightly unfair generalisation of modern youth, this is nonetheless powerful stuff – and a good reason the the hard-right to say ‘I told you so!’

9. Deadgirl – Offering a twist on the standard zombie formula, ‘Deadgirl’ challenges preconception and offers the audience a morality tale with bite. School friends Rickie and J.T. discover a girl tied to a table in an abandoned hospital. After arguing about what to do, Rickie leaves, leaving J.T. alone with his new friend, who he soon discovers is not your normal girl. After forcing himself on her and having his way, it becomes apparent that she is undead, as J.T. has shot her three times and she’s still alive. With J.T. seemingly becoming obsessed with ‘Deadgirl’ and telling his friend Wheeler about her, Rickie starts to face a moral dilemma about what to do. A modern take on the traditional ‘coming-of-age’ dilemmas that carefully treads the fine line between decency and bad taste, ‘Deadgirl’ is an interesting exercise in doing things slightly differently, and not as gory or disgusting as you might think.

8. The House of the Devil – The spirit of Hammer is alive and well in this effective little chiller from director Ti West eschews the gore and torture option in favour of slow-building suspense and terror. Broken student Samantha accepts a strange babysitting job for the mysterious Ulmans, and soon regrets it as her peaceful evening of earning easy money turns into a hellish nightmare from which there is no escape. Old-school in the extreme, this movie could easily have come from the late seventies/early eighties, and it may be too slow for fans of more action based horror, but stick with it and it certainly delivers the scares with style. Look out for ‘Manhunter’ baddie Tom Noonan as the creepy Mr. Ulman.

7. Dead Snow – A group of kids discover some WWII Nazi gold during a skiing trip. Unfortunately, the Nazi’s want it back, and are still haunting the mountain region looking for it. Some have critised it for being a bit slow but once it gets going, and a few annoying clichés aside (e.g. the horror movie nerd who references classic zombie movies all the time), this Norwegian zombie-fest is tremendous fun and will have you squealing with delight as intestines get ripped out and wrapped around trees, along with some other startling death scenes. Zombies, blood, snow – what else do you need?

6. Infestation – B-movie monster madness returns in this ridiculously fun movie. Christopher Marquette stars as Cooper, a wise-cracking slacker who is about to get fired from his job when the big bugs strike. Assembling a group of survivors, Cooper attempts to lead them to his former soldier father’s house, where they can hide out in his underground bunker, but things go a bit tits up and Cooper the slacker has to prove his worthiness. Wonderfully silly, this movie is an obvious homage to movies such as ‘Tremors’, but it does it so well and with it’s tongue stuck firmly in it’s cheek that you cannot fail to go along for the ride. Not as gory or messy as it could have been – and that’s not a bad thing – this is a great no-brainer movie. And the final scene is a guaranteed winner!

5. The Last House on the Left – Yes, it’s another remake but a remake with a difference – it’s actually pretty good. Although the original movie is an important part of horror/exploitation history, it’s also a movie that’s pretty rough and could do with a 21st century makeover. Escaped convict Krug (Garret Dillahunt) and his family rape and torture two teenage girls and leave them for dead. Seeking refuge from a storm they go to the nearest house, unaware that it is owned by the parents of one of the girls, who soon twig who their new guests are. Obviously not as groundbreaking or shocking as the original, this is still a tense and sometimes uncomfortable movie that, if you haven’t seen the original, will no doubt send a shiver down the spine. Ignore the final retribution shot though, because it is pants.

4. Drag Me To Hell – After years putting his name to Hollywood blockbusters, ‘Evil Dead’ director Sam Raimi returned to his roots with this gloriously slapstick horror/comedy that managed to tick all the right boxes. Christine Brown (Alison Lohman) works in a bank and is hoping to get a promotion. To convince her boss that she has the ability to make tough decisions, she refuses to grant a mortgage extension for elderly Mrs. Ganush (Lorna Rava), who, taking the refusal as an insult, places a curse upon Christine. For the next three days, Christine is to be visited by the Lamia, an ancient demon that will terrorize her and then drag her straight to Hell. In desperation, Christine turns to Rham Jas (Dileep Rao), a fortune teller who may be able to help stop the curse, but will they be in time? Obviously comparable to ‘Evil Dead 2’, ‘DMTH’ is a fast-paced romp that will shock and amuse in massive doses. Not as heavy on the gore as ‘Evil Dead’ – but it didn’t need to be – and proof that Raimi can still make these sorts of movie, the only real fault with it is that Bruce Campbell isn’t in it.

3. Inside (À l’intérieur) – Displaying a sense of terror rarely seen in a movie, ‘Inside’ is the story of Sarah (Alysson Paradis), a mother-to-be who, the night before she is due to give birth, is visited by a stranger (Béatrice Dalle), who seems intent on claiming Sarah’s baby for herself – literally. And that pretty much makes up the basis for this movie, as Sarah is seen defending herself from the ghost-like ‘La Femme’ (as she is credited). One of the goriest and most disturbing movies ever, ‘Inside’ is handled brilliantly and is never gratuitous or titillating, and La Femme is certainly one of the most effective screen baddies of recent years. It’s been around for a couple of years now, but has only just been granted a certificate in this country, so now is the chance to catch up and see why French horror is making such a mark within the genre. I just hope that there isn’t an American remake on the way (no offence to any American readers!).

2. Martyrs – Another French movie that’s been around for a while, ‘Martyrs’ is the story of Lucie (Mylène Jampanoï), a teenage girl who kills what seems to be an average middle class family. When Lucie’s friend Anna (Morjana Alaoui) turns up, Lucie reveals that the parents in the family were the people who kept Lucie prisoner when she was a child and subjected her to various forms of torture. After Lucie succumbs to her childhood demons, Anna starts to tidy up the house, and makes an amazing discovery. What happens next sees Anna descend into the same sort of madness as Lucie, only with more horrifying results. Revealing too much about ‘Martyrs’ takes away it’s impact, as this movie is full of twists and turns and just when you think you have it pinned down, it reveals another horror to torment you with. Extremely hard viewing and maybe not a movie you’ll watch more than once, ‘Martyrs’ is possibly the most harrowing, yet thought-provoking, movie you’ll ever see, and not one you’ll forget about in a hurry.

1. Trick ‘r Treat – And here it is – my favourite horror movie of the year. ‘Trick ‘r Treat’ is an anthology of four horror stories that, unlike other horror anthologies such as ‘Creepshow’, has all four stories criss-crossing into each other. All set in the same town on the same night (and supposedly at the same time, but that’s debateable) the first story concerns a head teacher who has a novel way of carving jack o’lanterns, the second concerns a young lady looking for her ‘first time’; first time what? I couldn’t say! Story number three is about a bus driver who kills a bus load of children with behavioural difficulties, at the request of the town’s parents. Unfortunately, a group of kids on a Halloween prank visit the site of the crash, and meet some of the bus’ passengers. The final story concerns a grouchy old miser who can’t stand Halloween or trick or treaters, so he gets a visit from what seems to be the spirit of Halloween to warn him of the error of his ways. Stylish, fast-paced and, most importantly, fun, ‘Trick ‘r Treat’ does have a few flaws (the timeline being the obvious one) but these are easily forgotten due to the spooky atmosphere and mischievous sense of fun throughout. Definitely the most enjoyable film to have come out in a while, probably even this decade, and is sure to gain cult status in the future.